AIN'T TOO PROUD TO BEG.

I CANNOT FATHOM WHAT HAS PREVENTED ME FROM POSTING ABOUT THE TEMPTATIONS BEFORE?!!? BECAUSE AIN'T TOO PROUD TO BEG IS HANDS DOWN THE BEST SONG OF ALL TIME!!!

NOW ITS TIME FOR ME TO LEARN THESE DANCE MOVES OFF BY HEART AND I'LL BE SET FOR LIFE. 

NB: THE MATCHING SUITS. EPIC.

ENTER SANDMAN

I don't remember who posted this on facebook. But as soon as I saw the link I died laughing, it was a truly happy surprise. If you don't think this is great, then you have no heart. LOL. I'm kidding. For metallica fans everywhere. or general fans of LOLCATS.

You'll need to click on the image to enlarge it. Very much so, WORTH IT!

WHATS BETTER THAN DREW BARRYMORE, ALICE IN WONDERLAND AND CIGARETTES?

NOTHING.

BOG DYLAN.

I never thought I would bother to blog again, but after Ana, my friend and only reader of this blog mentioned it during our general car park coffee drinking/chain smoking gang, I thought I would surprise her with this blog post the next time she accidentally happens to fall onto the site. Just like that picture that kept coming back to haunt me every 5 minutes I checked facebook, which numerous profanity filled messages to Andrea telling her to delete it failed miserably; hopefully you stumbling onto this won't be as horrific an experience as that photo, but I am sure it's very close. Bog Dylan; Ana's favourite.

I will end on this good note: 

Moses John Malone: "i

dont know whats worse, hitler murdering millions of jews or this photo"

I <3 MIKE GIANT.

YES I could go on and on for approximately 59 years about how I wish I was this man, and if you don't know of Mike Giant, I'm telling you, you're missing out. He is the greatest artist of all time ever, ok, so I'm biased as I clearly LOVE his work but if you like bold, black and white lines and tattoo-esque imagery, then this man is for you, he also appropriately is a tattoo artist, which makes sense once you see his work...







Anyways I was just checking out the Rebel8 blog to realise that they had a new drop of goodies for me to oogle over and then get excited by the desperate feeling of need for their new tees.
So I mention Rebel8 because Mike Giant is behind all the prints, hence my intense love of it all.
Anyways on most days if you talk to me I will have 2 dollars on me and 5 cents in my bank account, but I was freshly paid and as per my usual behaviour, an impulse buy was necessary as soon as I spotted this A M A Z I N G tee.


Ok so if I wasn't such a povo I'd actually want this tattooed on me as I love day of the dead skulls and everything cholo related - which pretty much describes alot of what Giant draws - explaining why Mike Giant's work and I mesh so well. LOL
Anywho now I am waiting in sheer excitement/anticipation of that package to arrive and appropriately since I have sent myself into poor-dom once again, i'll be waiting out 2 weeks before I get paid again/can afford to live/go out in public, which works out well as I will probably get the tee in 2 weeks from the US - so at least on the upside, when I emerge from my hermit shell i'll at least be wearing something new...

I'M DA BEST MAYNE. I DEED IT.

HE DEED IT.

STALKING CAT

HILARIOUS.

HEADBANGING WHILE MAKING FIRE.

There are no words for something as truly amazing as you are about to witness.
Ok I'm straight out lying but trust me this video - although it may seem tedious to watch two metal dudes headbang to absolutely no music whilst one every now and then tends to trying to start a fire... - it is freakin AMAZING. Look its seriously only longer than a mintue and if at the end you aren't in stitches as I was, then I apologise, I just made you lose a minute or more of your life and for that I'm not truly sorry because IT'S TOTALLY WORTH IT.
\m/ (I know right I just did the most ultimate n00b thing possible. Keyboard character hard core symbol. Barfs welcome here).

On a completely unrelated side note. I am looking forward to uni assignments dying off in the ass, as I have so many DIY things I wanna do. Mostly clothing related. Ok for one. I have a pack of 500 silver studs... do you hear me?!?!! STUDS. And to this day I haven't studded ONE THING.

OH THE UTTER SHAME. And people remember be for loving MUTHAFUCKIN STUDS, I have really let down everyone... sorry to disappoint anyone that thought I'd be decked out head to toe in studs (so... by everyone/anyone I really just mean me) for the meantime I'll have to pretend my piercings are like my face has been studded, that should keep me satisfied for the time being...?

COMPLETELY UNRELATED TOPIC NO. 2:

Oh hellz yeah. thanks src783

Is it just me or is it quite satisfying to see a chick kickin a dude's ass. I'm not some male hater (or am I?) I just see the enjoyment of seeing a dude get pwned by a model, that and the images just look pure awesome.
How can you not smile after viewing these, haha, I promise I'm not sadistic, I just see the enjoyment in being some ass-kickin, hot model.
We all have dreams right? LOL

MO' MONEY MO' PROBLEMS.

PFFT. That's a lie if ever I heard one, right now if I had more money I'd have no problems.
I'd have my roots done, fresh tattoos, a sick bike, killer clothing, a fresh packet of cigarettes.
I see no problems there. But truly I bring mo' up because I've recently been engulfed in the world of facial hair.
Now normally I am not a complainer of such a privilege/honour but this week - and I know why am I saying this but still cannot fathom saying it - I am moustachio-ed out.
Which should explain my lack of blog posts as I have been busy due to assignment doing for graphic design subjects.
This one, of which, I decided to do on the good ol' moustache.
Well really, I always had this idea to make a moustache hanger. SO.. since this assignment was our own choice, I decided to take the opportunity to take advantage of my idea and use it for uni, a perfect excuse to get things made and paid for without using my own money (thankyou parentals for paying for stuff to do with my "education")



Anyways I'm going to associate it with Movember for this assignment as, hey it gives it a purpose (as opposed to my generic love of all things facial hair - which I'm sure the average person just doesn't get).
Anyways I decided to create a giant moustache pillow also, as a promotional in store piece - which I now see I made ridiculously huge, so I guess it double as being a beanbag - minus the beans.


I'm quite happy to add these moustache things to my collection at the end of the assignment, as they all match the initial perspex necklace I made myself when my friend Andrea and I dabbled in the jewellery creation business under the label Lipstick and Bruises.

So really the point of this blog was to update whoever reads this aka. just my two friends Lauren and Ana, as to what I have been up to. Also during the writing of this blog, but mostly the uploading of photos, I realise just how much I love facial hair and looking at all the moustache goodies that I've had to make for myself (TANGENT: excuse me whats with that? hello single men if you ever see this hurry up and grow a moustache and ask me out so I don't have to make myself moustache goodness to enjoy!?!!) that there is never going to be a day that I don't enjoy facial hair.
I will end this blog now with some moustache inspiration for all. Yes. A combination of my two loves; fashion and facial hair.

WHY ARE CATS SO FUNNY?

JUST BECAUSE THEY ARE.

MAGIC'S IN THE MAKEUP.

I need no excuse to post this clip.
I will forever love this song, as I do the memories of watching and singing along to the Rock Steady Live dvd it came from.



Side note: I heard this version before the studio version. Let me just say this. LIVE IS ONE MILLION TIMES BETTER. Long live No Doubt.

I HAVE A SMALL PENIS.

Which mind you should be a good thing as I am a girl. But it is actually a sad reflection on my lack of twitter posts that as I previously mentioned, is updated hardly ever. Looks like I will take the opportunity to post more though and watch my penis grow. LOL
Check the size of your e-penis based on your twitter posts here. And if you're a real perve you can check your friends sizes too.

I have a 5cm penis. How sad.

TWEET TWEET BIIITCH TWEET TWEET

Need I say more. Just had a rofl over this actually catchy song about the twitter phenomenon I just don't seem to be getting into. Bit rich right when I actually have one - feel free to follow as it is updated irregularly. LOL - bit worrying really; seems I'm not gonna be a very good NMP student.

NO DOUBT IS BACK BITCHES.

YEP. Its true people, Gwen Stefani after a hiatus of losing her mind, has returned to her roots and come back to No Doubt so they can record an album and please the human race, if not, then at least myself. And let me tell you I am MIGHTY DELIGHTED.



Needless to say I downloaded (yeah I'm dodgy like that) their new song Stand and Deliver which apparently is an Adam & the Ants cover, and I say apparently as I have never actually heard the original and as I type this am considering going to YouTube and bothering to look it up. I actually just might. I ACTUALLY just might. (Ok. I obvs did since I linked it)

So anyways don't waste time here, hurry, with quick haste listen to Stand and Deliver - the No Doubt version.
That's a myspace link btw, as Youtube is being a giant piece of shit and due to copyright issues you can't find a copy of their cover that is unaltered there, but if you smoke crack and can pretend this sounds normal, then by all means give it a go.

Oh and for the record I was lying when I said Gwen Stefani lost her mind. I love her and everything she does. Yes Gwen, if you ever read this, which of course I'm sure you will since really we should be like BFF/twins, then I love you. Please don't chuck a Sam Ronson and get a restraining order out on me. I promise I am harmless.

Sam and Lindsay in happier lezzer times; when Sam still looked like a girl.

Since I'm on the subject of music, I thought I'd also chuck this in.


No. It isnt just a bearded man for no reason - although I am one to enjoy a beard so if I ever do decide to chuck a random beard man/gnome in a post with no explanation, accept it for what it is. Pure magnificence - the man pictured is actually Mat Weddle and he does the most beautiful version of Hey Ya I've ever heard.

He reminds me of Dallas Green in the way that you don't expect them to sing how they do and once they do you're completely in love. Just me again? Whatevs, this has now given me the perfect excuse to shove a picture of Dallas Green here as his tattooed, bearded, nerdy self - another one of my great loves.




I know. I tried to stop at one but couldn't help myself. But really, why question it? Just enjoy.
Oh and enjoy these two Dallas Green/City and Colour songs. This guy is AMAZING live.

Yep. I've definitely just made myself re-fall in love with this man.

I WISH I WAS EATEN BY A BEAR.

So it's almost the end of my uni holidays and I need to update this thing.
As a result of being really stuck for ideas this year - appropriately my FINAL year - when I desperately need to be filled to the brim with ideas and amazing design work. I find that I'm completely on the other end.
I'm swimming/lurking/dwelling in the ABYSS. So as a result I have been frequenting too many design blogs or blogs of vintage/random pictures in order to drain some inspiration from them which hopefully will result in me not epically failing this year, but the good thing is as a result I discovered this beauty.

The grizzly bear sleeping bag by Eiko Ishizawa.

I can't imagine anyone not enjoying the novelty of this. At least I know my friend Lauren will enjoy this as much as I did. I personally have never been camping but if I owned this I would find a way to go on camping trips all the time, that or maybe organise sleep overs with friends just to break this baby out. The detail of the face, even the inner gnarly teeth and pink lining, not to mention it perfectly zips up at the mouth is amazing, it makes it look so real, I mean at least at first glance. The death thing is, this isn't for sale ( I know right have a good ol' wah right here) it was just created for an exhibition.
But man, who doesn't wanna pretend they have been eaten by a bear and get to sleep inside its warm stomach all night?

HAR MAR SUPERSTAR VS. RON JEREMY

Ron Jeremy causes me severe disgust however I mention him today as whilst being slightly under the influence of wine, a friend of mine was watching this videoclip. It blew my mind.
Instantly I thought Ron Jeremy sings? WTF. (Note: Ron Jeremy is an overtly hideous beast that somehow has made it in the porn industry despite his repulsive exterior) But I'm not that stupid. I could tell it wasn't him but indeed a close following doppelganger.

The fat nugget known as Ron Jeremy.

His equally hideous twin Har Mar Superstar.

I had previously heard of Har Mar Superstar but didn't know anything nor much care.
Now however I am a changed woman, DUI is a great song.
It's definitely something I can imagine dancing to non stop. Anyways you must watch this clip. Quite enjoyable. If not for the cameo appearance from Har Mar's butt crack at the end, then definitely for his belly hugging wife beater/flares ensemble matched with amazing dance moves and receding hairline. Delicious.

FLAMINGOS.

YES. I finally got the Network Media Production first assignment done.
What is it on you ask?
Well my dears, FLAMINGOS of course. Clearly I am crazy enough to have one tattooed on myself that it was about time I actually did a piece of work on them.
It is actually meant to be an online exhibition, and my word was I quite delighted to look up about one MILLION images of flamingos.
It is true however, you do learn new things every day. I tell you I just knew I thought flamingos were beautiful and I thought there was just the standard pink feathered, long necked, long legged one.
Ok so they all do share a degree of pink colouring which I also learned was due to the carotene in their diet (aka. what is in carrots) maybe if I eat enough I could also turn a lovely shade of pink? Hmm...
But truly there are six different species of Flamingo. SIX. This means six tattoos I can get of the different species. LOL.
The one I have has cadillac fins attached to its bum, so I guess it's not a real Flamingo. Aka. SORRY MUM looks like I'm looking for more excuses to be ink covered! But back to the point. Six different species. Thing is once you look at the images you can see they vary, in colour, leg colour, beak colouring. It BLEW my mind to say the least.
Anyways without further a do, please enjoy or not enjoy looking at PINK PAGES of PINK FEATHERED FLAMINGOS.
OH and read all about the six species. So not only is it Pretty In Pink (vomit. lame pun) but its educational. How delightful.

http://flamingonmp.tumblr.com

Above. Is just ONE species of Flamingo. Can you imagine? JUST ONE. wow.

Oh and now with my all new knowledge thanks to my online exhibition I can confidently tell you that it is a Caribbean Flamingo. Uni made me smart.

BLACK IS THE NEW BLACK IS THE NEW BLACK IS THE NEW BLACK.

IN SHORT. I have discovered I really like wearing the colour black.
Now I didn't start off like this. I feel I have just rediscovered black since getting my hair rebleached to as white as it will let me without going bald.
Is it a contrast thing? or more that I have ballooned to a whale that black gives me needed comfort?
Who knows. What I do know though is I seriously LOVE black everything at the moment.
Am I turning into a GOTH but I'm in denial?

Possibly.

On a side note. You know who is a hot goth? Nicholas Cage's son.


LOL. I know. But seriously can you imagine a right freak like Nicholas Cage creating this kid.
Ok you probably can. But this kid called Weston Coppola Cage is 18 years old. (I'm a predator - I like my men young. lolvoms).
But check out the arms on this guy. Hubba Hubba.

I can't sit here and justify why this guy is attractive to me. Keep in mind I like long hair.

Now back to the point.
Having an already studded face doesn't necessarily help me NOT look like a goth, I guess. Oh. And I do have a black cat. Is it a coincidence? or am I going to start practicing black magic in my spare time?
If only.

First someone will have to pry me from my laptop and from the numerous amounts of fashion blogs that are wrecking my life. Ok, really they are filling my life with great fashion inspiration but also showing me clothes I wish I could have but can't afford and they are created by normal girls that are ridiculously stylish and the degree of thin I could never be.

But what I am getting at is - they have helped inspire my new black clothing fetish.
I mean black can be very clean and plain I guess, but not when you're the designer Gareth Pugh.

I'd never seen much of this man's work but initially heard of him from my friend Andrea. We had a good old ROFL at first at how his last name would be pronounced 'poo'.
This may not be the actual case. But look. Andrea and I find farts and the mention of penis' and vaginas funny. So we are bound to laugh at 'pugh/poo'.
I have no words for his designs so let me visually stimulate you.








YEEEOOWWW.
I need me some of these shredded to shit jeans, fur oversized shoulder pad capes, PLATFORM buckle heels and geometric jackets.
Oh and my love of whack items doesn't end there.
Here I insert another designer love of mine - DANIEL PALILLO.
Now not only do I love black clothes recently. I've become a bit of a monotone george and prefer black, white and grey.
Boring it seems I know. But I just so wholeheartedly don't agree. These colours or lack there of, are just classic.
They match everything. You pretty much can't go wrong.

But what Daniel Palillo does is use just the right amount of colour.
His designs are usually black and white which suits me just fine and more importantly what makes his designs amazing is everything is OVERSIZED to the point where you can't believe people of a normal size can wear and pull off his look.




Appropriately for my whale self his designs would probably be a tight sausage skin on me, but regardless if I could get my filthy mits on his goods I would be in LITERAL heaven.

Let's not get started on his recent design collaboration to make accessories. I DEFINITELY MUST HAVE THIS.

long chain hand necklaces. ftw.

I am definitely gonna pass out now. I hope I have sent you all into black clothing overload. Let alone experienced the amount of pain I feel when realising I don't own these items.
Now you have had a slight glimpse of what it's like to be me everyday.
Not a pretty sight is it.